Thoughts from my Couch

(Actually, I think a better title for this post would be “THOUGHTS AND CONFESSIONS ON FRIENDSHIP FROM THE COUCH WHILST WEARING SWEATPANTS, GROMIT SLIPPERS, AND A 27 YEAR OLD DISNEYLAND SWEATSHIRT“. But that didn’t fit in the Title Box)

I have been a terrible friend this year. No, don’t try to tell me otherwise. It’s true. I have known what a terrible friend I have been, but the longer I left emails unanswered and let packages sit, waiting to be mailed, the guiltier I felt and the longer I let them sit and left them unanswered. It has been a vicious cycle. I probably still owe you, dear reader, a letter, email, FaceTime chat, or text. I’m sorry.

This morning I stumbled upon a blog and was skimming through the posts when I saw the phrase “intentional in their friendship” (or something like that). There it is again! That word, intentional. It seems to be popping up a lot in my thoughts and reading lately, and it got me thinking. Again. Ugh, thinking is hard and borrrrriiiinnnnggggg (Boring: A word Christine likes to use when she doesn’t want to do something because she is lazy/doesn’t want to be an adult).

Friendship is hard and it takes work. “Duh, Christine.” Look, I know you know this, and I know I knew this, but sometimes I forget what I know and I have to learn it over again. See, I often picture friendship as something that goes like this:

Girl One loves A, B and C.

Girl Two loves  A, B and C.

The two meet.

“You love A, B and C? I LOVE A, B AND C!”

“WOW! We also seem to have that ineffable chemistry that makes for great friendships—let’s be friends!”

They hold hands and skip off into the land of Friendship is Magic, populated by Anne & Diana’s and Betsy & Tacy’s where everything is wonderful and everyone knows what to say and when to say it and they know when you need to talk and they know when to make you talk and when to listen and it’s all buttercups and roses and they are friends forever THE END.

That is absurd.

I’ve been sitting here, writing and re-writing this post, trying to figure out what it is I feel and what I’m trying to say. And I realized I don’t know what the hell I’m talking about, because I’m still trying to figure this all out. I could save this as a draft and wait until my thoughts are more coherent, but here is the thing—I’m tired of waiting until I have all this figured out. In the past two years I have come to truly understand that life does not have a pause button and you can’t wait to sort out This before you move forward with That—you have to do That in the midst of the mess of This. And so I’m going to be a little more open and raw on this here bloggy blog. Maybe we can all talk things through and learn and grow together instead of just, I don’t know, reading how I went from point 1 to 2 to 3 and now it is all grand, leave me happy comments!

All this to say that friendship takes work, and I have been selfish and maybe a little lost this year and I am sorry for that. Truly. I don’t want to take any of my dear friends for granted or make them feel like I’m ignoring them for other friends or activities. Maybe we need to encourage one another to be intentional with our friendships—schedule FaceTime chats, set aside an hour tonight to reply to that email instead of just saying “Oh, I’ll get to it eventually. They know I love them.” Sure, they may know it in their hearts, but sometimes being reminded of this, whether by saying the actual words or through your actions, can make someone feel really, really good. And I’m pretty sure making someone else feel good is a part of friendship.

Let’s go be intentional!

P.S. I love you.

 

 

Just Between You and Me

HELLO DEAR READERS! ONCE AGAIN IT HAS BEEN TOO LONG AND I HAVE TO USE ALL CAPS TO CONVEY ALL MY THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS AT BEING GONE FOR SO LONG AND OH GOODNESS I MISSED YOU!

Hi there.

Just between you and me, does this year feel off to you? Don’t get me wrong, this year has had some great moments and awesome things have happened—but it’s also been full of things that just didn’t feel quite…right. Even Twitter has felt off. Am I the only one feeling this way? IS THIS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GROW UP? I hope not. Lame.

I have been doing a lot of thinking the past week. A LOT of thinking. Here are the things I have thought.

1. I like writing.
2. I miss blogging.
3. I like reading what others people think and feel and connecting with them through the internets.
4. I want to write a blog post every week.
5. I don’t care if the only people who read my blog are Kate and my mom.
6. I want to write whatever the hell I want to write!
7. Simple, sincere writing is what I most love to read, so I’m gonna write that.
8. I’m a nerd. There will probably be a post about Captain America.
9. I didn’t really need to list all these things but OH WELL.

There was more I was going to say today, but I don’t want this post to turn into a rambling 1,500 word post because I feel the best way to dive back into blogging is to stick your toe into the water first. Then you back up, run, and cannonball into the Internet and scream and splash a bunch of people on Twitter and Instagram, and pop up laughing because oh my gosh, this is fun and it feels so right and what the hell took you so long to jump back in anyways?

I’ve missed the hell out of you, my darlings.

And I ask myself, well, how did I get here?

HELLO DEAR READERS!

I don’t even know where to begin.

I moved! Let’s start there.

Once upon a time, I decided I wanted a change from Austin. So I went on Twitter and asked Twitter who wanted to move to NYC with me. Or anywhere. One of my close Twitter followers said “You should move to Chicago and be my roommate!” Long story short, I did and now I am. The internet is weird and wonderful like that. I may also be a little bit crazy, but we already knew that.

So here I am, not quite in the Windy City, but it’s a quick drive or train ride away. I’m sharing the second floor apartment of an older house that has been converted to two living spaces in downtown Super Cute Suburban Town with the super cool Roommate. I’ve been here six weeks and I am still unemployed (maybe one day I’ll tell you my hilariously awful job interview stories), but I worked my ass off last year and have the savings account to show for it, so I’m not too worried about it, honestly.

I’m reveling in the free time I suddenly have. I’ve been doing a lot of reading, crafting, and some writing. Mostly though, I’ve been thinking. Thinking about life, the universe, friends, goals, what the hell I want to do with my life and how I get there. I found the perfect hike and bike trail that was made for evening walks, chasing the sunset. Sometimes I go on a walk and contemplate deep and meaningful questions, and sometimes I just walk and listen to the birds and smile at the passing joggers. I have no idea what tomorrow may bring–and I’m okay with that. In fact, I kinda like it.

I have loads more to share with you, but all in good time. Okay? Okay.

A Post About Books

Twitter pal, fellow Newsies lover and book blogger Kim of Reflections of a Book Addict recently tagged me in post in which she asked me and other bloggers questions about books and other randoms. I’m supossed to tag eleven other bloggers and come up with eleven new questions, but guys, I’ve had this in my drafts for over a week, so I’m just going to publish this now, okay? If you want to answer these questions on your own blog, please do and let me know! I’ll read it and tell you I think you’re swell. Because if you are still reading my blog, you are indeed a lovely, lovely person.

What is the one book you recommend to people over and over?

 Persuasion for everyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice is the only book Jane Austen wrote. I am also working to spread the gospel of YA books and have been shoving The Queen’s Thief series by Megan Whalen Turner in the face of everyone I know.

Why did you start blogging?

I was bored with a lot of time on my hands. Hahaha, okay, that is only partially true. I had been reading blogs for a few years and I decided I wanted to join in with all the fun. I’m glad I did. I would have never met Kate and Kate is swell.

If you had all the money in the world and could travel to ONE place, where would it be and why?

ONE place—just one? Kim, why are you trying to kill me? I have a bad case of Wanderlust and would be happy to travel anywhere in the world (and universe, once that option becomes available). But if I can only choose ONE, it has to be Egypt. I have been in love with that place since I was a tiny baby Christine and I would happily spend months traveling up and down the Nile, visiting museums and archaeological sites and tombs and markets and OH MY GOSH SOMEONE TAKE ME THERE RIGHT NOW.

Who is your favorite author?

AustenDickensTolkienWallace. Can you imagine what that book would look like? It would probably be so amazing you would go insane once you finished it because you couldn’t handle its genius. I just figured out what the Infinite Jest is—a film adaptation of the book written by AustenDickensTolkienWallace.

Since I can’t pick one all-time favorite, I’ll say that my favorite living author at the moment is John Green. Not only for his books (one day, maybe I’ll write about how much I loved The Fault in Our Stars and what it means to me), but for the community he and his brother Hank have fostered over on the YouTubes. I wish the Nerdfighter community had been around when I was a teenager, but I am so happy and thankful it exists today for the teens I know. I have mad respect for that man and I think he’s cool.

If you had to give your blog a color to describe it, what color would you give it?

Green with white polka dots. My blog is a print.

What book started your love of reading?

Probably this book.

I literally can’t remember a time I did not love to read. Thanks Mom.

What is your favorite genre to read?

Books about books. That one goes out to The Brother.

Is there a film adaptation that you think was better than the book? What film?

I can’t think of one. I do think the film version of The Virgin Suicides is the perfect companion to the book.

Where is your favorite place to read?

I’m partial to the couch in The Brother’s house whilst he and BFF X play video games. Otherwise, I’m quite fond of my bed, under the covers. Or on a bench outside. Actually, I don’t think I have a favorite place to read. Wait—at the box office when I’m working, because then I am getting paid to read and I feel like I’m living the dream.

What is your favorite guilty pleasure read?

Re-reads of books I love and know by heart. There are so many books out there I have yet to read, so I do sometimes feel guilty for reading Harry Potter for the 20th time. But it makes me happy, so oh well. Who cares.

Do you prefer solids or e-books?

Solids. I am learning to like ebooks and I enjoy checking ebooks out of the library, but I still prefer to carry around a physical book.

That was fun Kim! Now if anyone has books they want to recommend me, leave a comment! You know I always need new books to read.

Dearest Darling Dickens

Don’t looked so shocked. You knew I would be back. And look, I’ve written twenty blog posts in my brain—I just haven’t transcribed them to the Interenets yet. Give me time. I’m down to two jobs now and the holiday season is behind us, so we’ll have plenty of free time. That noise you just heard was the universe laughing at me.

Once upon a time, Christine was twelve. It such a long time ago. I had a pen pal and she lived in New Zealand. We were both homeschooled and our mom’s decided we should read a book together for school or something. Honestly, the details are a little fuzzy, and maybe I was thirteen, but regardless a book was chosen and that book was David Copperfield by Charles Dickens.

You might have heard of him.

Anyways, I read David Copperfield and I fell in love. I fell in love with the characters, the language, and the beautiful, wonderful, rambling sentences that only Dickens could write. Seriously, the man could go on and on and I love to read him go on and on and it may be where I picked up my rambling tendencies and maybe, just maybe, that is why I had to name my blog something with the word “rambling” in it. Because that is what I do and I learned from the best.

The first Dickens I bought was David Copperfield. It was a lovely vintage edition that was part of a massive set that was on sale at the local Half-Price bookstore. I saved up my babysitting money and would go back and pick out another book from the set to add to my collection (or coerced my mom into buying them for me, like I said, my brain is a little fuzzy on the factual details). But one day I returned to find they rest had all been bought! Oh the sadness. The OCD part of my brain was heartbroken to know I would not able to have a complete and matching set.

And then a lovely illustrated copy of A Tale of Two Cities was bought for another English assignment. When I visited my pen pal in New Zealand when I was fifteen, I bought five Dickens books that were compact, soft-bound leather, with the tinest print and perfect for carrying around whilst traveling. And that is when my ecclectic, mis-matched, vintage Dickens book collection really began. Now, whenever I travel, I check out used bookstores for old and interesting copies of Dickens work to add to my collection. I added Sketches by Boz on another trip to Auckland and Nicholas Nickleby was picked up…in Texas, somewhere. When I visit the Strand in March with Kate (because that is happening, I’ll tell you about it later), I’ll be sure to look for a copy of Great Expectations, because I really can’t believe I don’t already own a copy.

I know I’m a day late, but I want to wish my beloved Dickens a very happy 200th birthday. I wish he was still around to celebrate it with me. I do love him so.

Making Christmas

Dear Readers, I know.

“CHRISTINE! Halloween was only two days ago!”

Yes, I realize this but–

“IT’S NOT EVEN ANYWHERE NEAR THANKSGIVING!”

Hey now–I’ll have you know that Thanksgiving (AKA The Greatest Holiday That Is Not the Fourth of July) is a mere twenty-two days away! So that argument is invalid.

“CHRISTINE!”

I KNOW! Believe me, I know. But guess what? As a girl working THREE jobs with a list full of people living overseas whose packages have to be mailed early in November to ensure delivery by Christmas, it is NOT, in fact, too early to be thinking about Christmas.

“Uggggggghhhhh–”

Quit your moaning! Look, you can skip this post and come back to it the end of November if it makes you happy. Okay?

“Okay.”

As I was saying…

As a girl working three jobs with a list full of people living overseas whose packages have to be mailed early in November to ensure delivery by Christmas–I have to start Christmas shopping early. Which I don’t mind at all. I LOVE buying people gifts. It’s honestly one of my favorite things to do. If I won the lottery, after I bought a bunch of real estate, traveled the world and put half of what was left in savings, I would probably spend the other half buying gifts for the people I love. Wouldn’t that be amazing? But I digress.

This year I miraculously finished shopping for my BFF & little nephew in New Zealand absurdly early and was ready to wrap everything up by mid-October. That is when I discovered not only was there no Christmas wrapping paper to be found in my house, but there was no Christmas wrapping paper to buy in the stores either. Well, there wasn’t any Christmas paper in the three stores I went to one Tuesday night. So, I did what a girl in the Year of Making Do would do—I improvised. Call me smug, but I like my version way more than any paper I could’ve bought.

Armed with coupon for Michael’s (seriously, if you buy something at Michael’s for full price, you are doing something wrong) I bought a large roll of plain brown craft paper. I pulled out my box of Christmas related craft goodies I picked up last year on clearance (most of it from Martha Stewart—man, do I love her stuff) and decorated the plainly wrapped presents with stickers, crafty tape and glitter. Lots of glitter.

In lieu of tags, I wrote the first initial of the recipient in glitter (or microbeads). The above is my favorite. Simple yet oh so pretty. I had so much fun wrapping and crafting that I will definitely do it for the rest of my presents this year. Thankfully, I have enough glitter to go around.

Happy crafting!

Guilty Pleasures

I have a confession. Nay, a proclamation: I love Justin Bieber. Do you think I’m joking? What if I said it in sparkling purple letters?

It wasn’t love at first sight. Or even first listen. I mean, I knew who he was and I knew all the little girls in the world were in love with him, but I hadn’t listened to a second of his music. Then one day he somehow came up in a conversation with The Brother and our BFF X. I made some dismissive remark about the Biebs and The Brother (the musician, you know) said “Have you even heard “Baby”?”

“Ummm, no.”

“You have to listen to it. It’s pure pop genius.”

“WHAT?!”

“It really is good,” BFF X affirmed.

And so they made me listen to Baby. Pretty soon, we were listening to it on repeat in the car running around Austin. A lot. But it wasn’t until we finally rented Never Say Never (from Redbox, because it was a last minute movie decision and there was no way in hell we were going to walk into I Love Video and rent it) that I became a Belieber. A 26 year old Belieber who pre-orders his upcoming Christmas album. Yes. This has happened.

Thirteen year-old Christine would be so ashamed of nearly 27 year-old Christine. Young teenage Christine shunned EVERYTHING her peers were into back in the day. ‘N Sync, Hanson, JTT (Jonathan Taylor Thomas, in case you have somehow forgotten how hot he was in the ’90s), nail polish, lip gloss, Clueless…I could go on for pages. Instead, I listened to Glen Miller, read Dickens and Austen (“I’ll stick with reading the book that Clueless ripped off, thank you very much”) and watched Casablanca approximately 47 times in one year. Maybe that is how I justify my Bieber love. “Look, World, I wasn’t into the Backstreet Boys, so I am allowed Justin Bieber as my guilty pleasure, okay?”

Honestly though, the idea that I should somehow feel guilty over something that makes me happy is just plain absurd. Who made up these rules, anyway? I love reading young adult novels. I love Radiohead. I love Justin Bieber. I love Jane Austen. I love watching The Fashion Police. I love David Foster Wallace. None of these loves are mutually exclusive. I’m happy to say that at the ripe old age of almost 27, I have finally learned to openly embrace what brings me pleasure while leaving the “guilt” behind.

So, dear readers, what are YOUR so called “guilty pleasures”? Whatever it is, I hope you have learned to embrace it, own it and love it! And tell me all about it in the comments.

Forever a Belieber,